Sermon Discussion Questions:

1. If we are tempted to "unqualified optimism" or "unmitigated despair" which one seems more tempting to you?

2. Read Eccl 8:1-17. What limitation given in this chapter is most difficult to wrap your head around and why?

3. How can the Preacher simulatenously praise wisdom, but also seem to criticize it? Why is Jesus called "the wisdom of God" in 1 Cor 1:30? (See also Col 2:3).

4. What do we learn about how to relate to the State from this chapter?

5. Read Eccl 8:14, and then read 8:11. Is the Preacher accusing God of failing to judge the wicked? See also Eccl 8:12-13 and Psalm 73.

 Life is great, and life is terrible. Life is tragic. And life is wonderful. And that's the book of Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes is like a ballast used to keep a ship upright, giving you two counterbalances to get you through the storms of life. It is here to sober you: Life is really hard. And it's here to cheer you up.

Life is wonderful. It's full of so many blessings that you take for granted. And without those two counterbalances, we can run into two equal and opposite errors: One of unqualified optimism or unmitigated despair. And you know what? It's really easy today to run into either of those. So on the one hand, we live at a time today where it seems like everything's always getting better.

For instance, did you know more people die today from an overabundance of food and the diseases that come with that, than people die today from starvation? I'm not trying to make light of the problems, only noting that "problem" in itself is a remarkable notch of progress. The problem is that we have too much food today, rather than the opposite!

I wonder if you've heard of a man, a YouTube personality, named Brian Johnson. Brian Johnson was a tech entrepreneur who created the company Venmo and eventually sold it for 800 million dollars. And then he has used all of that money now to fight the war against death.

He believes that through enough health, nutrition, exercise, the right supplements, and science, you can functionally stop aging. Here's what he writes on his website: "We are at war with death and its causes. We are building towards an infinite horizon. We are fighting for the freedom to exist as long as one chooses. Why? Because we have things to do tomorrow. And tomorrow's tomorrow until we no longer want tomorrow."

That is a worldview that says, with enough of the right stuff, you can have everything that you want. You can have tomorrow and tomorrow's tomorrow until you just don't want tomorrow anymore. You can live forever. And most of us, when we hear about that, we see that's a naive level of confidence in medicine and technology today. But when we look at what technology and medicine has progressed to, his quest for immortality doesn't seem as ridiculous or implausible as it did for most of human history.

You can have unqualified optimism today. And yet, bizarrely, you can also have unmitigated despair. Tomorrow will mark the one year anniversary of the Hamas terrorists flying into Israel and killing 1,200 innocent Israelis. And now, over the past year, tens of thousands of Palestinians have died in the war.

Wars raging in the world around us today seem impossible to stop. Only growing and getting more complicated and difficult. And I could go on, but I don't need more illustrations to expand upon the tragedy of life today--we all are tragically, very aware of it.

In 1919, uh, William Butler Yeats, an Irishman, had lived through World War I, which was the calamity of all calamities at that point. And right as the war ended, the Spanish flu broke out and killed countless more. And then, immediately after that, in Yeats country of Ireland, a civil war broke out. And Yeats wrote probably his most famous poem, called The Second Coming, And you've probably heard this line from it:

Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Things fall apart. Now how can we live in a world where we can, on the one hand, think: maybe we can stop dying. Maybe through artificial intelligence and advances in computing and medical science, maybe we can stop every bad thing! How can we believe that, yet at the same time when we hear that poem, all of us immediately say: Yes, things do fall apart, the best men in life lack conviction, and it is the worst of men who have the most passionate intensity.

How can we have both of those things? We can because this is not a problem of the 20th or 21st century. This is a problem that has existed since sin has entered the world. And Ecclesiastes is here to welcome you to the problem. And to give you wisdom as you walk through it. The controlling metaphor that I've been trying to present to you to understand the book of Ecclesiastes and its message to you is that you are a passenger on a train headed to a destination that you did not choose that will end at a time that you do not know.

Modern life, as we experience it, convinces us that we are helicopter pilots. Free to navigate this way and that way, wherever we choose or please. We can get off whenever we want, or we can keep on flying. And Ecclesiastes is here to tell you, you're a passenger, not a pilot. And here's how to enjoy the ride.

That's what chapter 8's about today. So let's read Ecclesiastes chapter 8. And by God's grace, hopefully we'll receive a counterbalance against the two dangers of unqualified optimism and unmitigated despair. And in between, we will find wisdom and joy. So let's read Ecclesiastes 8:

1 Who is like the wise?
And who knows the interpretation of a thing?
A man’s wisdom makes his face shine,
and the hardness of his face is changed.
2 I say: Keep the king’s command, because of God’s oath to him. 3 Be not hasty to go from his presence. Do not take your stand in an evil cause, for he does whatever he pleases. 4 For the word of the king is supreme, and who may say to him, “What are you doing?” 5 Whoever keeps a command will know no evil thing, and the wise heart will know the proper time and the just way. 6 For there is a time and a way for everything, although man’s trouble lies heavy on him. 7 For he does not know what is to be, for who can tell him how it will be? 8 No man has power to retain the spirit, or power over the day of death. There is no discharge from war, nor will wickedness deliver those who are given to it. 9 All this I observed while applying my heart to all that is done under the sun, when man had power over man to his hurt.

10 Then I saw the wicked buried. They used to go in and out of the holy place and were praised in the city where they had done such things. This also is vanity. 11 Because the sentence against an evil deed is not executed speedily, the heart of the children of man is fully set to do evil. 12 Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him. 13 But it will not be well with the wicked, neither will he prolong his days like a shadow, because he does not fear before God.

14 There is a vanity that takes place on earth, that there are righteous people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the wicked, and there are wicked people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the righteous. I said that this also is vanity. 15 And I commend joy, for man has nothing better under the sun but to eat and drink and be joyful, for this will go with him in his toil through the days of his life that God has given him under the sun.
16 When I applied my heart to know wisdom, and to see the business that is done on earth, how neither day nor night do one’s eyes see sleep, 17 then I saw all the work of God, that man cannot find out the work that is done under the sun. However much man may toil in seeking, he will not find it out. Even though a wise man claims to know, he cannot find it out.

Chapter 8, like the rest of the book of Ecclesiastes, centers on what you cannot do and what is limited. So here's my sermon outline.

You cannot know everything, you cannot do whatever you want, you cannot make a perfect world, and you cannot live forever. So, enjoy life. 

You Cannot Know Everything

Who is like the wise? And who knows the interpretation of a thing? - Ecc 8:1a

The rhetorical question at the beginning, “Who is like the wise?” Assumes you know the answer. The answer, of course, is “No one else” or at least, “very few.” Wisdom is incredibly rare, so rare, that it is like humility—it is a direction of life that one always pursues, not a destination one arrives at. Which is what Solomon seems to be warning against with the closing of this chapter:

16 When I applied my heart to know wisdom, and to see the business that is done on earth, how neither day nor night do one’s eyes see sleep, 17 then I saw all the work of God, that man cannot find out the work that is done under the sun. However much man may toil in seeking, he will not find it out. Even though a wise man claims to know, he cannot find it out. - Eccl 8:16-17

What is the Preacher looking for? He wants to “know wisdom” and then, with that wisdom, he wants to see the “business that is done on earth.” He wants to know the underlying scheme (Eccl 7:27) of how the world works, to know not only what, but also why, and how. This pursuit, apparently, has robbed him of sleep—literally his eyes do not see sleep. But they do see “all the work of God.” Which is an impressive claim—until you read the next phrase which describes what he means be “all the work of God,”…”that man cannot find out the work that is done under the sun. However much man may toil in seeking, he will not find it out. Even though a wise man claims to know, he cannot find it out.”

Wisdom, the Preacher’s main pursuit, has not given him a key to answer every riddle of life. There are limits to what it can do. The Preacher’s perspective on wisdom in the book of Ecclesiastes is sophisticated and complex. Wisdom is praised repeatedly. It is far better to live a life of wisdom than a life of folly. Yet, wisdom is not without limits. When Solomon attempted to have a perspective where he saw everything, he purposely leans into the paradox of “I saw all of God’s work, and what did I find? I found what I could not find.” If you remember, last week, we looked at Solomon’s quest to find the scheme of life. Six times in six verses Solomon told us his attempt to “find” the answer to life, and what did he find? The limits of mankind. “23 All this I have tested by wisdom. I said, “I will be wise,” but it was far from me. 24 That which has been is far off, and deep, very deep; who can find it out?” (Eccl 7:23-24). So too, here he claims: “However much man may toil in seeking, he will not find it out. Even though a wise man claims to know, he cannot find it out.”

What does this mean for us? It means that God’s will for your life is not to know everything. Deuteronomy 29:29 is a helpful verse to memorize and meditate on: “The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law.” There are “secret things” that God has not chosen to reveal to us. I wonder if you ever feel frustrated that God doesn’t give you more answers. Maybe you are puzzling over something in the Bible or wrestling with a theological concept, or maybe you are just baffled at what is happening in your life, or in the world around you. Why, God? What do you do? You should study the Bible, read, learn, pray, pursue after wisdom like riches…but also don’t assume that every question will be answered.

Yet, for all its limitations, wisdom is very precious.

Who is like the wise? And who knows the interpretation of a thing? A man’s wisdom makes his face shine, and the hardness of his face is changed.

• Eccl 8:1

Wisdom is so valuable because it gives you the ability “to know the interpretation of a thing.” You know how to interpret the times you live in, you know how to interpret the behavior of those around you. Wisdom may not be a key to answer every riddle in life, but it is a key to answer many riddles in life. In fact, wisdom will change your very demeanor. Wisdom will make your face shine, and the hardness of your face will be changed. Now, earlier Solomon told us that it was “by sadness of face the heart is made glad,” (Eccl 7:3), so this doesn’t mean that you can point out who the wise people are by who looks the happiest. Sometimes, wisdom will make you more sad because you won’t be free to live in the bubble of self-centered ignorance anymore. But wisdom will soften you, it will release a knot of tension inside of you. Not because you know everything but because you know the one who does. Your countenance is softened because you fear the Lord and know that He is in control; the lines have fallen for you in pleasant places because the have been laid by Him.

Wisdom is not crystal ball that can peer into the future. Wisdom is responding in the moment with faith and love towards God. And perhaps this is why the New Testament, when commending wisdom, does not point us towards a philosophy or intellectual endeavor, but points us towards a person. Paul tells us that because of God we “are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God,” (1 Cor 1:30); in fact, in Christ “are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge,” (Col 2:3). Jesus is the very wisdom of God. If you put your faith in Jesus Christ, you will be making—quite literally—the wisest decision you can possibly make. To be wise you don’t need to answer every question and peer behind every curtain, you do not need to perceive all mysteries and all knowledge and always know the perfect thing to do in each scenario: you need only receive from God’s hand what He has for you, and the main thing that He has for you…is Himself.

You Cannot Do Whatever You Want

There is quite a bit to explain in this section, so we will read through it verse by verse and I’ll try to clarify what may be confusing, and then we can see what application we can derive from it.

I say: Keep the king’s command, because of God’s oath to him. 3 Be not hasty to go from his presence. Do not take your stand in an evil cause, for he does whatever he pleases. 4 For the word of the king is supreme, and who may say to him, “What are you doing?” (Eccl 8:2-4)

Here, the Preacher emphasizes the limitations on your life that come from submitting to the authorities God has placed over you, particularly those of the government.

We, obviously, do not have kings ruling over us today and, unless we work for the State, do not actively take oaths of obedience or swear fealty to our city councils or mayors or state governors. We are more similar to the Christians in the New Testament who live under the rule of the Roman government. Jesus famously tells us that when it comes to paying our taxes, we are to “Render to Caesar that which is Caesar’s,” (Mark 12:17). And Paul in Romans 13, “Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God,” (Rom 13:1). So, while we may not make oaths to a king, this section does nevertheless still apply to us today, and extends beyond only the realm of government, to submission to authority in general.

Going from the king’s presence does not mean that you are to perpetually stand next to the king, but likely refers to abandoning one’s post or responsibility. Maybe the king, or boss, or leader, does something that you don’t like. The Preacher says, Be slow to walk away. The second phrase, “Do not take your stand in an evil cause” is even more ambiguous. It could serve as the opposite exhortation, meaning, “On the one hand, don’t be rash in quickly giving up your role in serving the king, but on the other, don’t stand in evil either; if need be, flee from a wicked king, because he will do whatever he wants.” In that sense, there is a warning placed on the unquestioned power of a king.

Matthew Henry’s comments here are fitting: “We must not be forward to find fault with the public administration, or quarrel with every thing that is not just according to our mind, nor quit our post of service under the government, and throw it up, upon every discontent…There may perhaps be a just cause to go out of his sight; but be not hasty to do it; act with great deliberation.”

But, another interpretation would also work. “Do not take your stand in an evil cause,” could also be a warning for you, in your service to the authority over you, don’t stand up for something wrong, foolhardy, or unwise. If you try to use your position to perpetrate evil, watch out! The king has the power to judge you! You won’t be able to stop him! Now, because this chapter speaks so positively of a king and his commands, I think the Preacher is assuming that the king isn’t a tyrant issuing evil commands, but acting righteously. So, while I believe everything Matthew Henry is saying is true and helpful, I think the warning here isn’t about kings, but about subjects acting foolishly and wickedly.

To return to Paul’s teaching in Romans 13, he says, in light of the fact that those in authority have been instituted by God: “Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, 4 for he is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer” (Rom 13:2-4).

And you may read that and think: But what about when the governing authorities ARE a terror to good? What happens when they use their power not to punish evil, but punish righteousness? And it is helpful for us to remember, of course, that Paul doesn’t have a pollyanna perspective on Rome. Roman government was thoroughly pagan, thoroughly brutal. How could Paul tell Christians in Rome to submit to that? I think a similar argument could be made about any teaching in the Bible about submission to authority. Paul tells wives to submit to their husbands; church members to submit to their pastors; children to submit to their parents. Surely, Paul was aware of husbands, pastors, and parents who all abused their authority. But the Bible can commend God’s good design of an institution—like marriage, and families, and churches, and government—and the appropriate submission to those authorities, even while reserving the ability to condemn corrupt authority and to reject disqualified authority.

How do you know when to do that and what that looks like? You’ll need wisdom.

5 Whoever keeps a command will know no evil thing, and the wise heart will know the proper time and the just way. 6 For there is a time and a way for everything,” (Ecc 8:5-6a). There is a time and a way for everything. This reminds us of the song of time the Preacher shared back in chapter 3, and just like we were told there, the Preacher quickly admits a problem. In Ecclesiastes 3, we were told that God has put the darkness of ignorance in our hearts so that we don’t know what will come or what will happen (Ecc 3:11), so too here he admits:

“although man’s trouble lies heavy on him. 7 For he does not know what is to be, for who can tell him how it will be?” (Eccl 8:6b-7).

Again, wisdom is not a crystal ball. Wisdom is not an algorithm that gives you the next 15 steps to take in life. In fact, wisdom begins by admitting the limitations of it. So, what does one do when confronted with a thorny and befuddling scenario at work, in the home, or under the government when submitting to authority seems difficult or unclear?

The normal posture the Bible dictates for us all is to have a posture of submission towards authority. But there may be a time when out of obedience to God, we cannot submit to the authority over us because to do so would be to disobey the ultimate authority of God. To know that time, you need wisdom. To get a snapshot of what wisdom is and is not in this regard, consider taking time this week to study James 3:13-18

“17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. 18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.”

You Cannot Make a Perfect World

9 All this I observed while applying my heart to all that is done under the sun, when man had power over man to his hurt. Then I saw the wicked buried. They used to go in and out of the holy place and were praised in the city where they had done such things. This also is vanity. - Eccl 8:9-10

One of the more galling aspects of life is to see bad guys be praised like good guys. This is what the Preacher saw, the wicked going in and out of the holy place—the temple—and are being praised in the city for their false-righteousness. And, not only that, but he also sees righteous people being treated like the unrighteous:

There is a vanity that takes place on earth, that there are righteous people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the wicked, and there are wicked people to whom it happens according to the deeds of the righteous. I said that this also is vanity. - Eccl 8:14

Why does this happen?

He tells us in part in verse 11, “11 Because the sentence against an evil deed is not executed speedily, the heart of the children of man is fully set to do evil,” (Ecc 8:11). Justice delayed generates a sense of “There are no consequences for me.” Though the Preacher has a positive perspective on government, here he admits that the king can fail in his administration of justice. If you can break the law and there are no consequences, then the fear of reprisal fades away, and impunity takes it place. The rules don’t apply to me. And as you look around at the world, it may feel like there is a lot of this.

When the sentence against evil isn’t carried out, the heart of the children of man learn: there are no consequences!

But there are.

Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him. 13 But it will not be well with the wicked, neither will he prolong his days like a shadow, because he does not fear before God. - Ecc 8:12-13

The preacher is using the eyes of faith to counter what the eyes of experience see. His eyes of experience sees sinners who are sinning a thousand times, a hundred times, and the earth doesn't open up and swallow them. Lightning bolts don't come down. In fact, the skeptical person could read this and say, Isn't God ultimately the one who's failing to speedily execute justice? Verse 11 told us that because justice isn't carried out speedily, men's hearts are fully set on evil. God, aren't you the ultimate judge and king? So why do we see sinners who do whatever they want, and life seems to go well for them? That would be a good question to ask God, wouldn't it? Here, Solomon uses the eyes of faith. He says, I know it will be well for those who fear God. And it's gonna go real badly for those who don't.

Psalm 73 offer us a helpful reflection:

Truly God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart. 2 But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. 3 For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

…

Behold, these are the wicked; always at ease, they increase in riches. 13 All in vain have I kept my heart clean and washed my hands in innocence. 14 For all the day long I have been stricken and rebuked every morning. 15 If I had said, “I will speak thus,” I would have betrayed the generation of your children. 16 But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, 17 until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end. 18 Truly you set them in slippery places; you make them fall to ruin. 19 How they are destroyed in a moment, swept away utterly by terrors! 20 Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms. 21 When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, 22 I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you. 23 Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. 24 You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. 25 Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. 26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and

Ps 73:1-3, 12-26

Trying to put together the puzzle pieces of this moral dilemma is exhausting. Why do wicked people prosper? Who are the most famous people in the world right now? Who are the people who have the most money in the world? And the most power and the most influence?

Do they fear God? Will there ever be justice? The psalmist, and the Preacher of Ecclesiastes say: Yes, they will receive their judgment. Don't envy them...they will soon perish.

Christian, if you've ever been embarrassed about the judgment of God, the second coming, the final judgment, I want to suggest to you that you may be missing a vital nutrient in your Christian diet to help you process the injustice of this world.

There is an enormous amount of injustice in this world. Life is not fair. There are people who live morally spectacular lives and they get kicked in the teeth and there are people who are crooked and life goes well for them. And if you do not have the eyes of faith to see what the Last Day will bring, you will grow embittered in heart.

You will nurse a secret envy that you are not even consciously aware of. We need to be able to see what God will do to those who fear and those who don't. You can't do whatever you want. And that brings us, you cannot live forever.

You Cannot Live Forever

Of course, all throughout that section, he just warned us about the wicked that he saw who flourished and thrived and prolonged their days and received the praise and accolades of men.

Where did he first see them? Buried in the ground. You can't live forever. Look at Ecclesiastes 8:8, "No man has power to retain the spirit. Power over the day of death. There's no discharge from war" War here could be referring again to the king commanding you to go fight in war. Or it could be a metaphor for the battle with death: You can't escape it. You can't send in a replacement. You can't send someone else to die for you. "...Nor will wickedness deliver those who are given to it." There's nothing you can do to escape it.

Everyone in this room is going to die. And there's nothing that will prevent it.

And friend, if you're living this life on a hope: you're hoping maybe as you come to the grave, things will go well for you. You're hoping that maybe you've been a good enough person So that when that day comes, which we don't know when it will, maybe things will be better than not. Maybe you think that you're gonna blink out of existence and there'll be no conscious experience after your death.

Maybe you think you'll be rewarded for the good things that you've done and the bad things will just be looked over. Or maybe you think that because of your family, your parents, that you have some sort of spiritual protection put over you. All of us, one day, much sooner than we think, at a moment that we did not choose, we'll be lurched out of this life and brought before a throne.

And the deeds and details of our life will be laid bare before an all seeing, holy God. And He will give to us precisely what we deserve.

And if you have the smallest shred of honesty, you know that to be such a terrifying reality that you have spent probably most of your life trying not to think about it.

No man has the power over the day of death.

Except one.

There is one man. And this is the man, the wisdom of God in flesh, the righteous one, who on the day of his death when he was brought before the throne of God and scrutinized for every millisecond of his life, every thought, every deed, every desire, every act, every word, was scrutinized before the filter of the holy righteous God.

He received: Well done, good and faithful son! You have kept my law. You have followed what is right. You have not deviated: Righteous!

Only one. But this one man, this righteous man, is a man who is willing to share his righteousness with you, and wants you to share your guilt and sin with him. And if you will come to him now, regardless of what you did yesterday or this week or the last year, if you will come to him right now and you will open your hands up to him and let go of your sin, He will take it from you and he will bear it away on the cross. And this man will give you his perfect Righteousness. And then he can say something like this: "I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live. Everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die," (John 11:25-26).

You cannot live forever, but you can live forever in Christ. This life will close far sooner than you think. You have no idea when it is coming and there is a terrifying judgment awaiting you, but if right now you will come to Jesus Christ, he will give you certainty and salvation and you can approach the grave with confidence, Christian. You can die in Christ and yet live.

What do you have to lose?

You don't know everything. You can't do whatever you want. You can't make a perfect world and you can't live forever. Things fall apart. But in Christ, he holds all things together. Does he not?

And that brings us to our last point.

Let's party.

"I commend joy. For man has nothing better under the sun, but to eat and drink and be joyful, for this will go with him in his toil through the days of his life that God has given him under the sun," (Eccl 8:15).

Ecclesiastes gets a bad reputation as being a depressing book. This book, more than any other book, commends you to live a life of joy. To go out and to eat good food, and drink good wine, and hang out with friends, and just enjoy life.

Here's the key. If you think life is a life where you can know everything, that you can plan for everything, you can make a perfect world, you can do whatever you want, you can live forever-which is really just another way of saying, if you think you're God--well then you can't enjoy life. Let me prove it to you.

Maybe some of you in this room are planning a vacation. Or maybe you just went on a vacation. Or maybe you've ever been on a vacation before. If you approach a vacation, and you plan out everywhere that you're going to eat, and the activities that you're going to do, and the sights that you're going to see...Oh, that's so fun, isn't it?

It's a wonderful gift, to get to anticipate that. But have you ever had the moment, where in your planning, and in your expectations you ballooned what you thought was gonna happen to an unrealistic expectation and then you showed up and even though you're riding the roller coaster or seeing the incredible sight, there's this note of sadness and disappointment: Oh, this wasn't what I thought it was gonna be.

What's gone wrong? We have attempted to so control the outcome, that we have actually ruined the experience. 

You can't enjoy life like that. The most enjoyable and satisfying moments of life are when you realize that you can't control everything. God is the one who controls everything. And if you can approach all of life--not just vacations--like that, you'll be able to enjoy the experiences of life.

Ecclesiastes is trying to provide you the pathway to the most satisfying and enjoying life by disabusing you of all of the silly ideas you have about how you should really be like God. So go enjoy lunch today knowing that God has given it to you as a gift. The sandwich, the drink, the time together with your family, the sunshine, the wind, all of it has been given to you by him just for you to enjoy.